machete masta tang chasa (see the link)

blade runner (1982): i was expecting this to be as bad as thx 1138 or dune, but i could actually sit through this one at least. its a very visual movie but has next to nothing plot-wise. its about a guy going after a few killers. so what? they throw in the fact that they are not really human. okay then, he is going after a few non-human killers. end of story. technically, this movie excels in sound, music, fx, art design, and cinematography. but the story is boring, pace is slow, its confusing at a number of times, hard to pick up on all the famous little ambiguities scott throws in such as if harrison ford is really human or not. yeah, i must have blinked at the wrong spot because i totally missed that one. great for its time with all the moral issues, but the average movie watcher today wouldn’t use this dvd as a coaster. don’t see.

amelie (2001): visually wonderful and extremely witty. this movie has been calling my name for years every time i’d see the dvd on a shelf somewhere. it is such a sweet little movie and the entire cast is so real. i would like to believe that these are the norm for movies over in france, and if that’s the case i’m on a one way ticket over. audrey tautou (amelie) is so perfect and beautiful and believable in this movie. granted this came out 4 years ago, but i guarantee she’ll be a household name in the next few years over here in the states. its another movie with subtitles but don’t grumble because like all movies with them, you hardly notice they are there after the first 10 minutes. for some reason i can’t say its worth buying. it is a little slow at points so that is probably why. i’m going to put it on my back up list to buy though, so over time i will own this movie. the message they are saying is wonderful and everyone should at least see it once. cute date movie for all your saps out there, myself included.

started working on more internship crap. lets just say i'm praying for me to get the one in dc this fall. went to my doc today and it actually went really, really well. he came up with some amazing ideas. i hope i can remember them all. i guess he does deserve all that money they pay him. so we'll see if some of this stuff works. other than that, life is the same.

a shopping list for the stench in all of us

the ring 2 (2005): right off the bat its not as good as the first. there is no fun mystery of figuring out something huge (like the tape in the first movie). they have resorted to the old fashion way of scaring people by just coming right out and showing you everything where as the first movie it was scary because of the things you didn't get a full glimpse of. also they use much of the same tactics as the first, so its just a big repeat. nothing new (except the insane chase up the well at the end!!!). the plot is kind of thin so you can see that they had a hard time trying to justify why samara is back. don't get me wrong, it is scary and a good movie, but the first one was a homerun in my eyes. its best to leave your thoughts of the ring on a high note. don't see.

i see my stupid link box to the right is finally working again. piece of crap. well, karen officially left this afternoon. she had quite the time trying to get to this dumpy state and finally leave it. looked as though she was going to be stuck here till tuesday, which is good for us, bad for her. luckily she got out though on some random afternoon flight. i had a blast with her here. we really didn’t do much, but the company was just really nice. the girls ended up watching all of season 1 of one tree hill on dvd and i introduced the movie magic that is kill bill volumes 1 and 2 to karen and kim for the first time. all in all, i was thrilled she came and hope to see her again in the summer time.

now i guess its back to the grind tomorrow. i got nothing accomplished over the break which is what i expected (except me ripping more cds to i-tunes which i'm up to 4,000 songs now!). i have about 10 internships i have to apply to by april 1 and haven’t began a single one. and don’t get me started on homework.

so we had a bomb scare at school today. wasted like three hours of my time for nothing. i could have been watching the movie dave on tnt, but nooooo, the retarded dogs said there was a bomb so i’m forced to suffer.

here’s some little suggestions for anyone needing to try a little something new in their life. ready, set, go.

• old spice classic deodorant stick – original scent – original round stick formula: not sure what the difference is between this and the usual stuff i use except this is cool green looking. its like winterfresh gum for your arms. yum yum. when you put some on, the refreshness is so thrilling that its like pouring cool water all over you. i usually have to look twice to make sure my clothes are still dry (no joke). a definite recommendation to the man’s man.

• crest whitening expressions – cinnamon rush: we all love those cinnamon chewy red bears they sell, so why not use them to brush your teeth? that is exactly what this toothpaste tastes like to a T. this probably means that this toothpaste is pure sugar just like the cinnamon bears, defeating the entire purpose of brushing your teeth, but its worth it. and caution!! you’ll be tempted to actually eat some of the toothpaste so be careful. just go buy a pound of bears and eat some after you brush your teeth.

• special effects – molding wax: what the crap is this you ask? this is the best guy’s hair product on the market. its green, doesn’t flake, doesn’t leave your hair hard as a rock like it used to look like in middle school, leaves a nice shine to it, and smells rather swell. it comes in a little twist thingy like most pomade comes in and i’ve only found it at the disgusting walmart store. i promise though, it is worth stepping into this cheap ass sick store for it. i’ve tried a number of fine and expensive hair products out there, but this $3 a can green glob of glory is worth its weight in gold.

• excedrin extra strength coated tablets: headaches, earaches, migraines, bones aches, cancer, tooth aches, menopause, blisters, crabs, anorexia, you name it and E will cure it. ehe best do-it-all med on the market. take 1 in the morning for a little pick me up. take 2 in the afternoon for good luck. take 3 a day for a healthy, legal addiction. whatever your condition, i’ll put my money on E.

• dolce & gabbana cologne: no one really wants a relationship with a woman who is naughty and too outspoken. sweet and subtle though is what i look for in my ho’s and my cologne. dolce can be pricey but is so worth it. not too hard, not too soft, but just right. you smell pretty bad most days of the week, so anything for you is better than nothing. but take a clue from a true pimp who knows: dolce keeps ‘em coming.

jAx isn't that special; i prolly got a grudge against all of you

yeah yeah yeah, i know its been forever. been really busy though doing this and that. i'm on spring break now which is nice, but i still have a ton of school work to do. what is the point of spring break if they are just gonna assign crap and exams to do over the break? i don't get it. but karen is here visiting which is really nice. she made a surprise appearance on kim yesterday and the whole thing went down really well.

my b-day went pretty good. i got some really cool stuff like dvds (sopranos, devil's advocate, 50 first dates, half baked, great expectation) and cds (oasis, stevie nicks) and more speakers for my car (rockford fosgate baby!!) and books (snowboarding, my only true love). my speakers in my jeep rock though. next on the list is to get an amp so i'm hoping maybe either for easter or mother's day i'll get one. kidding of course.

i'm being such a slacker right now cuz kar is here. i have an exam to do, homework to do, and to apply for a million internships. also been spending a lot of time on the comp transferring all my cds to i-tunes. so far i'm up to over 3,000 songs!!! woohoo!! i'm just about done though. plus, i just got another movie pass for the month at a different hollywood video, so i'll be wasting my days away there now. god just never gave us enough time in the day. haven't seen a new movie in weeks. but i have been catching up like mad on the dvds i actually own. its crazy concept to actually watch what you already have, but i'm trying something new. plus i gotta justify to kim why i keep buying more and more. have to justify to myself too. by the way, got sopranos season 1 on dvd thanks to mam!!!

its been raining like mad the last two days and today which makes for a very uninteresting spring break for most. i feel pretty bad for karen though. she was first delayed a whole day before flying out. now its muddy and wet outside. good for me though for the next time i go riding. hope to extend the season as long as possible.

so that's all you get today. i do have one important issue to address about toiletries, but its gonna have to wait. happy snow day.

p.s. if the people lacking mental capacity upstairs continue to jump up and down like stupid monkeys to get me to turn down my music, its going to turn into an all out war. i might have to take drastic measures like pissing in their gas tank or something. and i'm thinking about being jAx's friend again, but i don't know. still got to ponder that one.

xxiii part deux

happy st. patrick's day all. its a nice gloomy day out. not a drop of blue sky. how fitting. my wonderful day will consist of working, homework, and class tonight. and sadly i think i'll be taking that exam from hell either friday night or sometime saturday.

thank you to everyone that remembered and tried to make it good. thus far, props to kim, rye, kar, dad, jj, sena, pb, kris, mam, em, kri, t-money, tab, and that jessIE girl. you all try so hard to keep me happy and sane, and you all never seem to forget. there are more of you out there but i've sort of misplaced my cell phone. and the day is still young. currently i'm having a dilemma for this internship nonsense. i still might be able to do the one internship in dc, but it would be over the fall semester. otherwise i'm sure i could get an internship here at some court in utah or the public defender's office during the summer. lots of pro's and con's all around. got a ton of hw to get going on so i'll keep it short today. here's to all my fellow irish out there. and for all you non-irish, take a trip over to ryan's blog for some enlightening info. cheers everyone! have a cold green one for me.

coming soon: me and my ho's

so i didn't get the internship. not much more to say about that. i didn't kill myself over not getting it which i guess is a good thing. forgot to mention that it was greg's (evil ex-step dad) 40th birthday yesterday. i'll try and be nice since i know my bro and sis read this, but he certainly doesn't look 40. he looks more like he's 60. and for every extra year he's alive i think he gains an extra 20 pounds. so happy birthday fat ass. here's hoping for a few heart attacks before you're 50.

been spending all my time on i-tunes trying to get all my cd's copied to my library. since i was planning on buying an i-pod if i got the internship, i've got hooked on i-tunes. no i-pod now, so who knows why i'm still doing this massive i-tunes project. my professor for stats is going over the homework for the third day in a row now. this was due two days ago and most still haven't turned anything in yet. today is gonna consist of studying all day for that gay exam tonight. i can't wait for next week's spring break. i'm dying here and probably failing at least 2 of my classes.

you'd all be pretty proud of me cuz i'm running at least 5 or 6 nights a week. not running far, but as spring approaches i'll kick it up a few notches. i wish i had more time these days because i want to start playing computer games again. san andreas needs to come out yesterday for pc. i'm sick of waiting. since i apparently got nothing to talk about today, i give you, me and my bike:

my earliest memories of me and my bike seem to be me riding a big-wheel. i remember pushing really hard on the pedals so that the wheel would just go around in circles on the ground without actually going anywhere. my version of peeling out i guess. later on in vegas i got my first real bike i think. the bike even had those little plastic noise-maker things you could put on the spokes. no, not a cheap playing card attached, but those little colorful things. i used to push along the curb to try and maintain my balance. of course no one would help me learn to ride a bike, at least i don't remember anyone helping me. the day i finally "got it," fat greg (who was kinda skinny at the time) was mowing the lawn out front and i remember yelling to him saying how i was doing it. was pretty proud of myself.

in san jose i got this crappy bike for my birthday or x-mas that had this gear shifter in the middle of the handlebars. and it was only a 5 speed too. i attached some kinda of cyclometer/speedometer to it so i could try and add up my miles as i'd ride to school each day during 3rd-5th grade.

once we got to fresno, i started getting pretty interested in bikes and took apart that san jose bike and built me a new one. it was so sweet and i had used a ton of parts to transform it into a rad looking bmx style. then my mom found out and got mad at me. she made me take it all apart and put my old one back together. and of course i never road that old one ever again so that was a waste. used to take the good bike off some really sweet jumps though. fell off plenty of times. i even remember riding one of my friend's low rider bikes. he was one of the guys that i would do their homework to be their friend. he's also the one that showed me his sawed-off shotgun under his bed. by the way, those bikes are the most impractical bikes out there. way too hard to ride and steer. some how i ended up with a mountain bike i think. used to use this to sneak out of the house and ride to my girlfriend's house a few nights a week to just either hang out or drop little goodies off at her doorstep. i remember riding one night (and i was riding on the right side of the road like a good boy) and some retard wasn't looking and road head on into me. of course i wasn't paying attention either and it was super dark, but still, he was on the wrong side so he was in the fault. that's all i really remember about my biking experience. to this day i still want a nice street style bike, but hard to justify paying hundreds when i don't even have room for a bike at the house. this guy next to me has a white spot in his black hair. i should ask him if he's seen any dead people lately. the end.

temple again 

spring time's a comin 

utah fam 

robert f bennett

for the last two weeks now my life has revolved around a man i'll probably never meet and most likely would never dream of voting for. i'm so ready to just get the call, get the rejection, and then get back on with my life. literally i think about this internship and going to DC hundreds of times a day. supposedly they should know today who is going but i don't know when they'll call and tell people. there ended up being around 40 people who interviewed for 4 available spots. the interview and writing sample all went fairly well, but i assume everyone else's did too. last night i worked for a few hours on a stupid contract for my class. all BS mind you. day before, my ma, sis, and girl all went to slc just to check it out. ma had never been. wasn't bad i guess. lots of walking. and i was extremely grumpy that afternoon for various reasons. oh yeah, and all of our cars have now broke down and had battery trouble all within three days. nice huh? later this week is the exam from hell in my stupid 2 credit ethics class. so now i sit in my stats class where two students out of 18 actually did and turned in the homework. these people are the laziest bunch out there. i want to just leave and wait for my rejection call. as an ode to rejection in my life, herein contains a brief history of such:

• Emily Kine from 3rd through 5th grade
• Andrea Alonzo from 7th through 9th grade
• trumpet solo in o holy night in 9th grade
• first attempted kiss with kim
• job at the missionary training center here in provo
• job in someone's basement as a computer guy cuz i was "over-qualified"
• internship in DC this summer*
• law school next fall*

the students in this class are the bottom of the barrel in the education system. its a wonder they have all lived this long. this is an upper division stats class and he's teaching these retards how to copy and paste. i've had no time for movies this past week so i'm bummed about that. today i think i'll go home and watch a few and sulk. good times. and i'm firing winamp and hiring i-tunes. been using winamp for like 5 years now so a little change will be nice. and win media player sucks by the way.

* has not occurred yet, but its pretty much a guarantee.

my pertty lil sis 

go usa! 

slc temple 

big f'ing pity party for me, but you can get over it

The Jacket (2005): pretty confusing. they really leave you hanging about how the jacket really works and what is going to happen in the future with him. is he going to die when he dies in the jacket or does his future self live on? who knows, who cares. keira knightley looks amazing in the movie, but i hate her character. she seemed to be trying to act as kate winslet in eternal sunshine. didn't live up to kate though. there are some pretty disturbing scenes throughout when he is in the jacket. it'll be a challenge to some to not want to look away. and of course i have all my usual time travel paradox issues that the movies doesn't make sense of. its not worth seeing simply because there are too many unanswered questions at the end.

had a hard time yesterday. started the morning with a not so very good dream involving nat port. and of course the day ended by a nice batch of harsh reality. i have a good feeling that the crappiness of yesterday will seep into tomorrow when i have my interview and it will go terrible. actually, i'm thinking it will seep into the rest of the year. i wonder sometimes if friends are worth the hassle. sure, some good comes out of having them, but many times its more of a complication in my life than anything else. i wish i could just go into hiding for a few years. i guess that kinda what i did by coming to utah and that didn't help. school is terrible right now. its getting pretty close to being over, but this is one of the hardest semesters i've had because all of my teachers are the biggest retards alive. i hate going, i hate staying home and watching crappy dvd commentaries every day, i hate not having real friends at my disposal, i hate school, i hate waking up this early for my job, i hate the fact that there are seagulls out every morning but no coastline, i hate birthdays, i hate my stupid life, i hate money and stupid stocks i can't buy and those that can. i want to just leave it all behind and run away again. the greatest thing in the world that could happen is if i get this internship and take a break. or getting into a law school far from the crap would be nice too. i thought these dumb ass pills were helping, at least that's what i've been told. i couldn't really see a difference. the problem is that all it takes is for one bad week or one bad day for everything to just come flowing back into my head and i start thinking about dying again and about being alone on an island somewhere and about waking up and no one knowing who i am. i want to grow my hair out and just sit around. i want the time in life to read some really good books. i want to be in middle school again where friends would come over and ask if i could come out and play. no drama or storybook love. i can't even look myself in the mirror these days without feeling sick but i didn't used to feel this way. i always knew i wasn't good looking and was fat, but it didn't seem to make much of a difference then. now it drives me insane. speaking of unattractive fat guys, you hear fred durst has a new sex video out? way to go freddy! don't these people learn? anyways, i'm confused as always and don't have a clue what i want and what could make me happy. as someone once said, "I’m so sick of being in an off mood. I just want to be sure of my life and where its going and who with and wake up knowing as far as I can tell its going to be a happy day. I’m just tired of it all." that about sums it up.

so please feel free to leave the stupid ass comments telling me to get over all of this and quit whining. because that sure helps let me tell you. you know, the second i read that, everything is all better and i stop whining so thank you. and don't come to me about this crap either. i hate confrontation. as conor says:

and i'm not sure what the trouble was that started all of this
the reasons have run away but the feeling never did
it's not something i would recommend, but it is one way to live
cause what is simple in the moonlight, by the morning never is
what's so simple in the moonlight, by the morning is so complicated
what's so simple in the moonlight, so simple in the moonlight.

farewell long hair 

maybe another day 

i want a #1 fan

I <3 Huckabees (2004): no one should see this movie unless you are actually into philosophy, otherwise most of it will go right over your head. so its all yours tom. it was seriously like sitting through a philosophy class from a teacher that is trying to be funny but failing miserably. sure its an ensemble cast, but if you take them all and put em on toilets, it doesn't make the experience good just because they are an ensemble cast. was hoping for a really cool ending with a few twists, but the movie just fell flat. its random and too weird and i've already taken three philosophy classes in my time, which is more than enough for me. don't see.

so i think my grandpa is dying. he had congestive heart failure whatever that is, a heart attack, pneumonia, and bleeding ulcers out the yin yang. thought about maybe going out there and seeing him but i haven't seen him in like 12 years or so. it would just be weird and all. i love him like crazy though. i remember so many really good times with him. that time i used to have that involved the rest of my family seems like another life. hard to believe i used to see my aunt and uncle all the time. kinda sad i've lost touch with them all. if he dies of course i'll head out there for the funeral. gonna need extra doses of my meds for that great occasion.

i turned in all my papers for that internship (cover letter, resume, references, two letters of recommendation, transcripts, writing sample). turns out that only 3 others applied from my school. i guess i have to worry about all the byu and u of u peeps though. interviews next friday so wish me luck. all you bastards will have to come visit me in dc this summer if i get it.

kim and i are hopefully going to a nifty cinema/pub in slc this afternoon. they are playing some really good movies like life aquatic and closer. $2 a movie and we can eat lunch too so natalie here i come. and yes, i may claim to be her #1 fan of all time and her secret lover, but i have yet to see her making her half naked world premiere role in a thong. why you may ask? besides the fact that she's usually knocking down my door in just a thong, i was just too lazy to go when it came out. but after this, i will have seen all but one of her movies (12/13).

lastly, the bright eyes cd i bought is the greatest thing i've heard in close to a year. i need to cut back listening to it cuz i'm gonna get burned out on it soon. for those that care, the cd i got was 'i'm wide awake, its morning.' the other cd of his i haven't heard yet so i'll hopefully get that one soon. time to get ready now.

tearful words

This is the first day of my life
I swear I was born right in the doorway
I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed
Their spreading blankets on the beach

Yours is the first face that I saw
I think I was blind before I met you
Now I don’t know where I am
I don’t know where I’ve been
But I know where I want to go

And so I thought I’d let you know
That these things take forever
I especially am slow
But I realize that I need you
And I wondered if I could come home

Remember the time you drove all night
Just to meet me in the morning
And I thought it was strange you said everything changed
You felt as if you had just woke up
And you said “this is the first day of my life
I’m glad I didn’t die before I met you
But now I don’t care I could go anywhere with you
And I’d probably be happy”

So if you want to be with me
With these things there’s no telling
We just have to wait and see
But I’d rather be working for a paycheck
Then waiting to win the lottery
Besides maybe this time is different
I mean I really think you like me

keep the cookies

Con Air (1997): first off, it is very entertaining. lots of action and a fun little story. okay, now the bad news. where to begin. awful editing made for a million continuity problems. editing is key to action movies and they failed big time. nick cage granted is a good actor, but has a retard's voice. so when they decided to make him talk deeper and more like a retarded southerner, it gets old very fast and i pretty much couldn't wait for him to die by the end of the film. lots of factual issues that are just so far fetched. for instance, i doubt that the DEA or u.s. marshals can just pick up the phone and order apache helicopters and the national guard to just do whatever they want. isn't there some kind of chain of command they must go through? the guys working for DEA and the marshals seemed more like rogue agents rather than legit employees by the way they acted. the rest of the force must have had the day off since they are the only two actually working. acting was really bad from everyone except malkovich. and finally, steve buscemi would have been the saving grace, but he is hardly in the movie. they could have used a ton more of him. and don't even get me into why steve didn't kill the little girl in the movie. made no sense. worth noting that dave chappelle make a funny little appearance. don't see.

Mean Girls (2004): for what it was set out to do, it wasn't half bad. but pretty forgettable since i'm trying now to remember what i thought about it and can hardly remember the movie at all. i do recall lindsay lohan being rather good as far as her acting went, but i think i just liked her narration. i also think that this is one of those movies where the book is much better than what ends up on film. i'm not a fan of these type of pre- to early-teen movies, so i'll have to say that you shouldn't see it. but as far as that genre goes, if you like them, buy it because it is better than most non rated R teen movies.

Million Dollar Baby (2004): i feel dumb now having to review this after it won best picture. like i have to give it a good review or else. the acting awards are all well deserving. flawless acting by all of them. the editing i thought was great and every shot flowed perfect. they should have won that award as well. my only issue is that its not the most entertaining movie out there. you are definitely sucked in by its emotion and characters, but for much of the movie its just lots of talking. that's not a complaint; its just gonna be hard for some to sit through it. you aren't gonna have huge planes flying around or blind piano players shooting up and feeling up the ladies. its very much worth seeing. not sure if its worth the pest pic oscar (that should have gone to kill bill 2 or the passion), but you'll be happy you saw it.

on the drive to work this morning, i hit all green lights but one, which is extremely rare. i go through 8 or 9 lights and usually hit about half of them on red. not sure what this means except for the fact that i actually got to work on time. maybe it will be a good day today? doubtful. i'm having to stay late today at work because my relief is sick. i had some things i wanted to do today after work and i wanted to take a nap before class and maybe eat some lunch. looks like none of that is gonna happen now. i'm fine with covering for peeps here at work (some of them at least) but this person has told me twice now that she'd make me cookies because i covered for her a few months ago. still waiting for those cookies by the way. not that i actually want them, but its just the principle of the matter. and since i know she reads this, she better not make me those cookies now because i know it will only be because i've complained about it today.

work sucks right now. i for once in my life slept through the entire night, however i am dead tired right now. i slept for about 30 minutes already at work and watched the royal tenenbaums with the director commentary. i have so much i should be doing though. stuff for the internship and homework is being greatly neglected.

i got a gmail account yesterday and have been contemplating whether or not to replace my yahoo email with this. seems pretty cool and all so we'll see. not sure why i have the hesitation. probably because i've had this email for so long.

quote of the day (on bright eyes):

I don't know if I'd put it above E. Smith, at least not until Brighty performs Hari Kari on himself. But this is still my first listen.